A mentor of mine would always say to me, “You are what you put up with. You are not your safest job, you are your least safe job. You’re not your best employee, you are your worst. You are not your best client-service-interaction experience, you are your worst.” From this perspective, we can be driven to be our best – not perfect, but the best we can be.

A good role model needs to be open to bettering themselves by being open to criticism. Stanley Tree Service Inc. crew photo by TCI Magazine staff.

It takes courage and objectivity to ask yourself a few tough questions; the reason I write these types of articles is to challenge myself to be better. In other words, if I position myself as an expert, I better walk my talk. I also joke with a friend that the people who read these articles already do all the right behaviors.

Questions to ask yourself:

• Do I show up on time every day ready to be a role model?
• Do l walk my talk on safety, or do I cheat, making production the priority? “Just this one time.”
• Do I communicate effectively, or do I blame others because I am not prepared?
• Do I deliver exceptional client service, or do I blame the client when we make mistakes?
• Am I a good listener? Do I make sure my staff and clients feel important by truly listening?
• “Do I look out the window for someone to blame, or do I look in the mirror to take responsibility?” (Jim Collins, “Good to Great”).

Even if I fail this test (only half kidding), I was lucky enough to have several mentors who did (those things). And I work with several people now who do them. These are the people I try to emulate.

Good habits
It’s impossible to be perfect, but if you walk your talk consistently on these essential deliverables, you will be a good role model. Good habits may not achieve perfection, but they will solidify your credibility.
So, how do you know you have good habits?

Holding yourself accountable and receiving criticism
It’s not easy to hold others accountable, but it’s really difficult to be objective about our own weaknesses.

It is very easy to see other people’s faults. The things they do that drive us crazy. However, it takes discipline, tact and empathy to offer constructive criticism. Whether it’s teammates, family or friends, it is a challenging process. You want to share your concerns, because their blind spot is obvious to everyone but them. It is uncanny how consistently people will see your strengths and, more important, your peccadillos. You want what is best for this person, so you need to be direct while not hurting their feelings.

As hard as this process is to deliver constructive criticism, it’s much more difficult to receive it. How well do you receive feedback? Managers and owners; are you approachable? We all need to be open to hear from our teammates, no matter their position or job title. None of us is perfect, we all have things to work on. Giving people the ability and the encouragement to offer you advice will help them to see you differently. More important, people will respect your willingness to be open.

Set parameters
Be sure when encouraging people to offer feedback that you give them some guidelines; schedule time, be constructive and do it in private. Don’t let it turn into a complaint fest. People struggle when giving constructive criticism, especially to “the boss,” so sometimes people blurt out blunt or awkward statements, usually in the wrong setting. This is worse than not hearing from people, because an attempt to help you backfired. Even someone with the thickest skin will want to shoot the messenger. So make sure you set the rules before you ask your people for their suggestions.

The right person
You need to be sure to choose the right person to hold you accountable. This should be someone you can trust to have the courage to give you constructive criticism. They need to feel safe in order for them to be honest. You don’t need a yes person to blow sunshine, you need to commit to embracing their feedback. This helps you avoid morphing into bad habits.

Select someone close to you, a person at work who you trust. Create a script with specific open-ended questions. This will give them an opportunity to carefully craft their comments. Again, you want them to be honest but fair.

Another great way to do this in a much more formal application is to conduct a 360 peer review. A 360 peer review is a great way to garner feedback from a handful of people throughout the organization. Giving people a carefully crafted questionnaire makes it easy for them to let you know what you do well and what you need to work on. I have performed dozens of these, and it still surprises me how consistently people offer similar observations.

You are not perfect
If you want to be a thoughtful and effective leader, you need people to point out your blind spots. They call them blind spots for a reason. We all think the way we conduct ourselves is perfect, otherwise we would change. As painful as it is to hear the things we do that bother people (insert cringe feeling here), we need to. As hard as it is to face it, at least if you know what causes you to lose credibility, you can work on ways to change. Doing this really helps you set an example for your team.

Sometimes creating a new good habit is better than breaking an old bad habit. This concept comes from two great books: “The Power of Habit” by Charles Duhigg and “Atomic Habits” by James Clear. Even if you continue to have trouble with these annoying behaviors, and we usually do, admitting them makes you more relatable. Old-school types who never admit their mistakes come across as insecure. If you are a strong leader, you shouldn’t feel badly about a few places where you need to improve.

Be brave, be objective, be open to your team members’ ideas and be accountable. As Aristotle said, “He who cannot be a good follower cannot be a good leader.” This is the best way to be the role model you want to be.

David M. Anderson, CTSP and Massachusetts certified arborist, is a manager with Mayer Tree Service Inc., a 33-year TCIA member company based in Essex, Massachusetts. He also is a member of the TCI Magazine Editorial Advisory Committee.